For the past few weeks I've had that, 'I feel like everyone else is moving forward and I'm standing still' feeling. You know that feeling when you look around and it just looks like everyone around you is making progress in what they're doing and you're standing at the back screaming 'wait up guys', but your feet won't just move forward. Yeah, it sucks. Then I was sitting on my bed last night and I realised something. Yes, there are people around me who are getting married, having kids, buying houses, getting promotions, etc, etc, etc, but I've done other things that most of them will never do; and then I realised this morning that life is not a competition, even though sometimes it feels like it is. It's not about how someone else does something, or how far someone else has gotten with their career, or who married a nicer/better looking/richer husband, it's all about how much you get out of the things that you do, the people you know and the experiences that you have.
I've been through some crazy things over the past five or six years, some of them will never be told to anyone who wasn't there, some of them I'll tell to anyone who will listen. I travelled halfway round the world to see a band play, and they'll probably never know that. I moved to another state when I was 19 to live with a bunch of girls I barely knew, and one of them is now like a sister to me, someone I've been through some of the biggest highs and lows of my life with. I have finally discovered what I want to do with my life and what I want to get out of it, and it's time for me to finally do something about it.
I want to be able to spend my life making music, and the more I think about it, the more I immerse myself in it, the more I'm sure that it's what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. I was never made for 9-5 work, for sitting at a desk for eight hours a day staring at a computer screen and doing mindless, repetitive tasks that actually drain me more than doing something that requires energy or brainpower. Some people are made to spend their days in office buildings, I'm just not one of them. And so I'm going to fill this blog with things that I have done to actually make music. Each day I'm going to make myself report in about what I've done music wise, and where I'm at with different things. Some days it may be a bit boring, and others it will be far more interesting, but I guess that's how life works.
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